a hush-hush-flush of a deal in high stakes game of Texas hold’em

…and since the mention of “trailer lawyers” put my nose out of joint earlier today, it seems like a good time to post this little jewel of a news story from the National Underwriter – more accurately described as an old jewel reset in recycled spin and titled State Farm quietly settles Katrina claims.

A spokesman for State Farm said today that it has now settled more than 200 hurricane damage lawsuits brought by the Scruggs Katrina Group in Mississippi.

Well, you can bet Katrina’s behind the “settlements” (plural) were quiet – and double your bet there would have been no  dismissal without prejudice of the RICO claims had their not been a “quiet settlement” of all RICO plaintiff’s individual claims.

Spokesman Jeff McCollum said in addition that a case involving 38 plaintiffs in a federal court action accusing the firm of civil racketeering had been dismissed.Terms of the settlements were confidential. Mr. McCollum said only about 250 other cases remain.

Although Provost Umprey made the public statement, IMO, the dealer tossing the burn card in this high stakes game of Texas holdem was Gloria Shows – an opinion that I have no fact to support.

Frankly, I don’t think any supporting facts are needed.  If one carefully reads the  RICO complaint the logical conclusion is the cowboys of PU were partnered with an Annie Oakley of a client in the form of Glenda Shows.

Using a .22 caliber rifle at 90 feet (27 m), Oakley reputedly could split a playing card edge-on and put five or six more holes in it before it touched the ground.

IMO, Ms. Shows is a better shot and a similar tribute to her might read:

[Using] a Plaintiff produced a spiral bound volume of self-compiled evidence…[that]…included an aerial photograph depicting the path of a tornado passing over her home…[consequently]…whether taking a shot face-to-face or from a distance as far as Pascagoula is from Beaumont, Texas or Bloomington, Illinois, she could split State Farm’s defenses edge on and put 462 holes in same with her spiral notebook before a spokeman for the company could hit the ground claiming:

[State Farm]…does not engage in the sort of activity alleged in this litigation. Now-disbarred attorney Dickie Scruggs made unsupported RICO claims to great fanfare in June 2007. Since then, numerous legal, political, media and PR tactics used by Scruggs have been exposed as distortions. The baseless RICO claims have been dismissed and the underlying contract claims are in the process of being settled.

Even with the  hush-hush-flush of “quietly” and terms that were confidential, State Farm was so outgunned that all it could do was take a pot-shot at Dickie Scruggs.  Surely, a lesson learned that someone has entered in the appropriate database of the Farm’s slabberator system – even if the note says as little as immediately pay policy limits to any policyholder with spiral notebook of supporting evidence

While I’m speculating, I’ll add that it’s my opinion Shows was the dealer in one tough game of Texas holdem all the way to  showdown.

At that point, again speculation, I believe she picked up the winning hand for a jackpot containing everything but the trebble damages of RICO and had the hired guns of Provost Umphrey pay all Plaintiff’s their fair share.

Contrary to learned legal opinion, RICO remains on the table after settlement along with the Plaintiff’s evidence In files or spiral bound.  All is ready should there be another round.

Wouldn’t you just love to know what will pull the trigger to hold, fold or play it out?

I would – and one day I’d also like to meet Ms. Shows.  In fact, I think I’ll buy a spiral notebook and keep it in my car just in case the opportunity comes up.

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